New Season, New Rings for SNG

With the start of the 2010 SFL season the SNG is fully expecting a repeat of last season, along with another ring to add to their collection. The SNG is coming back with a new team that nobody in the league will be able to play with. Here are the bios for the new SNG:

Craig Matturo:
Although plagued by instability last season, Craig has been a valued part of the SNG in seasons past. When asked why he only appeared in the championship game last season, Craig had this to say, "That hoe alex fucked my shit up. I went into a slump and was hooked on the d-block for a while but now I'm clean and ready to fuck shit up." Look for Craig to shine brighter than he did in the championship, where rumour has it he was in the midst of rough withdrawls.

Joe Solo:
Joe was not only a first round pick, but also a loving and caring boyfriend to Kim Mina. Until of course he changed his mind and decided to befriend Jackie Fence. This cold hearted action is something that will fit right in at the SNG. Little is known about Joe's actual football talent.

Mike Stasko:
Stasko started with a humble beggining in the Ukraine. After immigrating to the US he single-handedly gave Ukrainians a lazy reputation. Before all-star Vinny Alestra found him, Mike was peddling jenkem on a New York City Street. Vinny fed, clothed and nurtured Mike until he was ready for the real world.

Look for Mike to be the sleeper pick of the year.

Brendan Thompson:
Brendan is another player with unrecognized talent. Requently called "BT", Brendan is expected to be a big part of SNG football. His athletic ability, along with his partying ability will make him a force to be reckoned with.

Josh:
Arguably the most athletic last pick ever, Josh is good at surfing.

Vinny Alestra:
Vinny had been a dedicated Guardsmen since day one. His talent was showcased for all to see during the championship series where he earned MVP. Vinny may not be able to play opening week after suffering facial trauma at banquet that needed reconstructive surgery. When asked about the current situation with Mel, Vinny said, "Bitches be crazy."

Dan Lubarda:
Although Dan's performance has been unpredictable lately, one thing that is predictable is that Zack Naja will be bent for the SFL opener. Zack smokes before every event in his life and SFL will be no exception. The kid is like a chimney. When asked about his favorite strain Zack said, "I smoke dat good shit." The only shit Zack will be smoking this season is coming from the SNG's rear end, S-A.